hectic week
So here's another another de-stressing photo :) Haaayyy :-)
It's a payday Thursday for us, and tomorrow will arrive some good news from the Big Boss, but I'm still not that excited. I guess I've gotten used to not spending and buying what I want lately. I've been saving up like crazy, but whenever I get the ATM receipt to check on my balance, I never seem to be contented with what I've achieved.
It sucks when you're depriving yourself 90% of the time. In Opus Dei terms, it's called "mortification" wherein you offer something up to lessen the suffering of other people, the poor, for instance. But for me, it's just called 'pagkukuripot-because-I-have-to-save-for-the-freaking-rainy-day'. Darn life. I thought I'd be happy once I've saved enough for Boracay money. I can't go anyway. I still got 20 days before I hopefully become a regular employee and be entitled of vacation/sick leaves. Darn darn darn... Besides, when that time comes my friends will be busy with work and I've no one to go with unless my Mom allows me and Tatoff. Ugh. This sucks. Time to stare at thes cute animals to soothe my aching senses...
* Plugging ulit: Try Bikram Yoga! It's at Dasma Village and it's great. It's my first time to experience sweat dripping from my head, forehead, eyes and nose, down to the floor! It's so hard when you're too inggit of people who can do poses that strain every inch of your body, but what the heck. I still felt like a pretzel and my knees were wobbly after.
Anyway, it's funny coz the instructress was my classmate with Sev almost 4 years ago. Small world, man. I like Pye's job. It seems so effortless (well, for her flexible and lean body) and she earns money (as usual, bigger than our daily 'employed' pay) while doing what she's passionate about. Envy schmenvy.
Okay gotta go, and work my butt off this back-straining office chair again. I'm forever in slouch mode. So much for all the back-bending-like-a-bridge spine poses last night. Ugh.
2:10 PM
Thursday, July 28, 2005
stress reliever
Aaaaccckkkkkk ang cute!!!
i want a cat!!!!!!!!!!!!
10:25 PM
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
OT time!
Wow after the wonderful 3-day weekend comes the wondrous OT. Oh well, it's okay. I'm ready and psyched for work, man. Bring it on! I'm a workaholic on the loose again. For some reason, I miss sleepless nights due to deadly deadlines. hehehe ;-D
* Plugging muna: If you know any writing/editing/proofreading job (that pays, of course), please leave a message here. I'm in the mood to swamp my days and nights with work and other activities so I'd have less idle TV moments. :)
Meanwhile, here's a quote for those yuppies and duppies (depressed young professionals) out there:
"Man is not made for work. Work is made for man."
I thank you.
Okay, back to work. Woohoooooo!!! ;-D
9:50 PM
it's friday, i'm inlab
Panaginip Part 2
I was watching a basketball game in a gym when an earthquake occurred. Parts of the earth flew out in space, and the next thing I know, I was trying my best to hold on to a big clear plastic ball (mala-Takeshi’s Castle ball with the person rolling inside). Some of the people didn’t survive, while I dropped in a foreign country, Africa maybe. The townspeople didn’t know what to feed us.
Next scene: Lindsay Lohan turned into a humongous black spider. She had a lesbian lover with her. They held hands/legs and ran into a river, or somewhere near Manila Bay. They jumped into the water, then Lindsay Lohan’s lover started to drowned her. She probably didn’t want to be seen with her. Lindsay the Spider struggled but she failed. She died and her family mourned over her loss. I was with her family after the incident. So does that mean I’m the one who drowned her? I don’t really know.
Okay that’s all I remember. What the hell is wrong with me and my dreams? And why is Lindsay Lohan in it?! Somebody please explain. Hehe.
===================
In other news...
"By virtue of Proclamation 880 issued by Malacanang, July 25, 2005 (Monday) has been declared a non-working holiday in Metro Manila, to encourage and give opportunity for us to listen to the state of the nation address of the President."
WOOOOPPPPEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! :-D
4:42 PM
Friday, July 22, 2005
para sa mga aduk
para sa mga nakaharap at nagpapakahirap (kuno) sa harap ng computer sa loob ng 9 na oras (o higit pa) araw-araw, gabi-gabi, sa loob ng 5 araw sa 1 linggo.
Mabuhay tayong lahat!
(courtesy of ala's lj :)
11:22 AM
Thursday, July 21, 2005
panaginip
I have to write this down before it slips my mind again. I've been having a lot of dreams lately and they're all so vivid in the morning, but when I start to write them down, they all disappear.
Anyway, here it goes: my dream in full color.
Last night, I dreamt I was a Grade School teacher in Ateneo, but my students were the Musmos kids. It was my first day to teach and I wasn't prepared at all, so I just told them to copy everything I write on the board. I got the chalk and copied from the book verbatim. Later on, the principal came in and asked me something. The next thing I know, there were writings on the board, cursing me because I blabbed about a student's misbehavior.
I immediately retaliated and told the class, "kung sino mang nagsulat nito, ang kapal ng mukha mo!" then when I looked at the back of the room, there sat a supervisor checking on my performance. Darn it. I instantly thought that I should quit that job. So there it is, I woke up feeling like I should resign from teaching. Haha. Whatever. Being a teacher only entered my mind once, after teaching Art to kids, but that's it. I'm not teaching any other subject.
I realized my dream's meaning though.
I need to go to Area because the Musmos kids are already haunting me!
Fine, fine I'll sacrifice rest day to visit them in Cubao. I will not be a couch potato this Saturday and drag my butt to the MRT station, and walk along the crazy alleys of Aurora.
There you go. I hope to remember and write more of my dreams next time. ============
Oh yeah, it's our 5th month yesterday :) Thanks for dinner and the Adidas shirt, in the green Batman wrapper. Hehe funny :D
Oy Tatong, magparamdam ka nga sa blog ko. Ugh. hehehe :)
10:35 AM
how do you keep fools busy?
6:41 PM
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
weekend bliss :)
It was my only Lola’s 70th birthday so we went to visit her at Oriental Mindoro during the weekend. I was more than happy to go despite the hassle of travel, because Tatoff tagged along. It’s hi first time to go to her house, and ever since, she couldn’t wait to meet him.
(I’ll skip the details of the trip, and go to the more exciting parts.)
We arrived in afternoon, and I introduced him to my relatives. Though he greeted the wrong lola the first time (haha), he made up for it and I got my Lola’s attention so she can give her hand para magmano si Tatoff. Hwehwe.
The awkward part was through and we’ve only been resting for around 10 minutes when my cousin shouted, "Barik na!" (That’s the term they use for ‘toma time’) I didn’t want to drink so soon because I just had LBM, but Tatoff wanted to join the alcoholic gang, so I obliged. I didn’t care if I was gonna crap like hell later on. I said to myself that something like that doesn’t happen often, so why miss it right? I can always use the restroom anyway.
And then the barikan began…
After the 4th bottle of Emperador Brandy, nasty hirits came and the interrogation’s on. Questions on marriage and my ultimate concern over my career sprung. Being the first man I introduced to my family, Tatoff’s presence was already too overwhelming for them. I think all the while they thought I was a lesbian (in the car, I even screamed, "Lalaki yan!" when my Tito thought I brought my ‘girlfriend') or that I was just so driven I didn’t care about anything but success (They always thought it was berserk and unbelievable to be single ‘til after college).
Good thing I wasn’t in my wag-nga-kayong-makialam-sa-buhya-ko mood, so I responded and smiled to their comments with glee. Tatoff kept laughing and enjoyed my relatives’ antics and kajologan. It was my first time to get tipsy with Emperador on the rocks, but it was worth it. Hearing his answers to my relatives’ questions fattened my tipsy heart. Haha!
I can’t remember everything that was said (as usual) but I remember how I felt when I heard them. At first I think I got scared for what I may hear because he was getting drunk and he might blurt out something hurtful, but I was wrong. Instead, his answers made me fall for him even more. I was really touched and I'll be perpetually grateful for having him.
I even remember my Tito asking me, "Maipagpapalit mo ba yung nararamdaman mo habang naka-holding hands kayong ganyan sa career?"
"Sa bagay." I couldn’t say anything more. I couldn’t explain myself even if my brain wanted to interfere. (O diba ang mushy ng mga lasheng)
After the 8th empty bottle of Empoy, Tatoff had to puke and so I accompanied him. We went out to the street and my alcoholic relatives continued to drink. As we looked for a spot, I thought it was odd to hear him say "This is the best suka ever" with matching American accent (hahaha!). I forgot what else he said but I remember puking because I witnessed him puke and I wanted to share his pain. Domino effect haha. After vomiting, I kissed him in the cheek to make him feel better (or worse?hehe). I just realized, nasukahan pala namin ung mga pananim na gulay ng kapitbahay. Oops.
We went in and I passed out beside my Mom, and he stayed with my cousins. The next morning, they were teasing him for standing in bed and going out of the house to check if I’m okay, then entering the wrong room afterwards. Meanwhile, I woke up with a headache and 9 mosquito bites in each arm. I slept beside my Mom who had none. How unfair is that? Ugh. Anyway, we drowned our hang overs in the beach and got tan, then started packing.
So there it is, the weekend’s over and reality’s back. I must say that I was very happy for their warm welcome despite the fact that all of them couldn’t get his name correctly. Despite my Tito telling him to "Practice (drinking) more, para di makaabala", I thought it was a great 2-day province visit. My Lola was so glad to finally see him and my other relatives still can’t believe that I brought someone along after all these years. My mom’s also very happy when he found out about my Tito’s interrogation and I was really moved with what she told me.
Tatoff doesn’t know this but from all his answers that drunken night, my Tito can only say one thing… but I’m not writing it here anymore. I just want to say that it’s definitely one of the best weekends in my entire life. Thanks, Tato. You’re the best. :)
11:21 AM
Monday, July 18, 2005
on friends leaving
I've been talking a lot about leaving this country, but I don't even know if it's a plausible case for me. Anyway, speaking of going aborad, I can't believe my close highschool friend Jahnniz is leaving for some middle eastern country on August. She's going to train as flight attendant, and I'm really excited for her. I'm glad she's gonna pursue a challenging job like that, in order to finance her real passion, which is dancing. Go Niz! I wish you all the best!!! I'll miss you!
On the other hand, I'm envious because I want to work abroad too. Obviously, pay's a lot bigger but I bet the homesick syndrome's deadly. I'm having mied feelings just imagining how I'll cope, but I'll be so proud of her when she gets through all this. I hope she'll be safe and free from Arabo perverts though.
=====
Anyway, I miss my high school barkada. It really sucks being left by people who matter to you. Being the one who leaves might be a bit better.
Gabi wants to leave the country. Crissy plans to go to Canada. Cris and Jamie are aboard Superferry even during weekends. Charl's training for Air Phils and will soon be on air. Jahnniz will soon be flying Saudia Airlines. Whatdaaaa?!?!?! Why am I on land?!?!?! I'll be the only one left in no time. How frustrating. I wish I could leave too.
But then again, I'll miss my college friends. I'll miss Aja, Sarah, Gelo, Wendy, Kate, JM, Coni, Pong, Jeff, Randy (who's in Singapore), Pau (who's in Naga), Abigail, Cathy, MiaPal, Mila, Idda, Alessa, etcetera etcetera.
And of course, I can't go abroad because I can't take leaving 2 beings - my Mom, and Tatoff.
Wiiiiittttwwwiiiiiiiwwwww!
Haay buhay... Kung pwede lang magtrabaho abroad, tapos umuwi sa Pinas araw-araw eh. Ugh. I want teleporting powers. Hwehwe. :P
12:09 AM
Friday, July 15, 2005
ngarag
Grabe ngarag ako, pakshyet. Ang sakit sa ulo. Bawal daw pag-usapan ang mga isyu sa trabaho sa blog kaya ayoko nang magkwento. Ugh ngarag talaga ko kahapon pa. Nakakairita. Bwisit. Gusto ko pa ng pera pero lugi talaga ang buhay pag employed at technically pang-fresh grad ang sweldo. Lecheeeee.
Ayoko na ngang magreklamo, ang sakit na ng ulo ko. Buti malapit nang mag-alas sais. Darn life. Kung pwede lang hindi na magtrabaho. Ugh ugh ugh.
5:39 PM
Thursday, July 14, 2005
reklamadorrrrr
Oras na para magwala. Pinauwi na kami ng alas-4. Malapit na mag-alas sais pero nandito pa rin ako. Bakit?!? Bigla kasing tumambak ang trabahooo. Nakakaburat. Parang wala nang bukas. Sabay-sabay ang utos. Pero okay na, nagawa ko lahat at naabot ang deadline. Pag may humabol pa at nagpagawa, ewan ko na lang. Magra-rally na ko kasama ng mga nasa Ayala.
Nabubuwisit ako sa katotohanang naapektuhan ang mga empleyado dahil sa malaking rally ngayon. Ayoko rin kay Gloria pero ayoko rin mag-rally. Lagi na lang ganun. Pag may ayaw na lider, rally ang solusyon. Anong kabaliwan 'to? 'Wag na lang tayo mag-eleksyon kung ganun. O wag na lang tayo magkaroon ng Presidente para wala tayong sinisisi at binabato kapag naghihirap na ang bansa.
Malamang ngayon puno na ang Ayala at Paseo de Roxas. Nandito pa rin ako sa opisina kasi nakakaburat lang lumabas at masaksihan ang kaguluhan na 'yan. Apektado lahat ng mga negosyo at mga nagtatrabaho. Di kaya mas natutuwa pa ang mga nagsisigawan sa harap ni Ninoy ngayon dahil nagtagumpay sila sa kanilang pakay? Maraming magrereklamong mga korporasyon kapag madalas kailangang magpauwi nang maaga dahil mahirap sumakay at baka magkagulo sa daan. At sa huli, sisisihin nila si GMA dahil hindi pa pagbigyan ang kanilang kahilingan.
Haay naku ang buhay nga naman. Isang taon pa lang si Gloria, ganito na. Ang sakit sa ulo kapag kailangan mong isipin ang nagyayari sa bansa, at isipin kung anong kinabukasan ang naghihintay sa 'yo. Pinipilit mo ngang magtrabaho nang mabuti para umasenso kahit papano, pero parang balewala rin ang lahat ng pagsisikap kapag nagkaleche-leche na ang bansang 'to.
Nakakapagod na. Mas naiintindihan ko na ngayon ang mga umaalis ng bansa para makapag-ipon ng pera at makaiwas sa kaguluhan ng politika. Ano nga kayang kinabukasan ang naghihintay sa henerasyon namin? Makayanan pa kaya naming magtaguyod ng komportableng buhay para sa aming magiging pamilya? Baka dumating ang araw, wala nang gustong magpakasal at mag-asawa dahil sa kakulangan sa pera. Tila mas magkakaroon ng mas magandang kinabukasan sa labas ng bansa ang susunod na henerasyon.
Ah basta bahala na si Batman, uwi na ko.
5:39 PM
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
should we stay or should we go?
I've been trying to detach myself from the current political bull but it's quite difficult. I'm part of the underpaid workforce now, and the withholding tax from my deduction slip numbs my senses every month. I can't help but think of possible opportunities outside this mellodramatic country. At the same time, I fail to overcome my attachment to this place I called 'home', despite the love-hate relationship I've been going through lately.
I'm not attached to any house, or to anything in particular. But I'd say I'm very much attached to relationships and friendships I've built through the years. I've only experience leaving this country once, and man, was it torturous not knowing anyone in a horrible boring foreign land. And I only stayed there for 2 weeks!
During the weekend, I had this conversation with my Mom and how she's open to leaving the country if the situation doesn't get any better. She's having a hard time as well, since people aren't confident to invest their money on property with the present economic turmoil. We have no relatives in the US, but a friend from there told her that all she or we have to do is get there, and he'll take care of EVERYTHING. (I think he owes my Mom a lot because she helped him with his MBA thesis before.)
Though the idea got my Mom excited, I had bittersweet feelings about it. As much as I want to earn and save up for the future, I still got to figure out if it's worth all the loneliness. I'd say "No." Maybe not yet. I've never dreamt of going to that country anyway. I still hold the notion that we don't live to work. As much as I can, I'd rather avoid all the stress that may lead to my early demise.
I guess I'd consider a country that's not too far away from here. At least there might be less discrimination or apathy. And it's much easier to go back home on special occasions.
I don't know why but the thought of leaving makes me queasy inspite it's practicality factor. Is it an escape? a wise decision? or THE only solution? I do think so.
If I wrote this almost 5 months ago, I'd be elated to escape this abyss with my Mom.
But things are different now.
I can't leave just like that.
12:36 PM
Monday, July 11, 2005
para sa inyo :)
photo taken from gettyimages.com
5:42 PM
Wednesday, July 06, 2005
d' dynamic duo
I've been wanting to write on this. But I really don't know how and where to start. Just figure it out for yourselves.
Some like them huge, while some wish they're a bit smaller.
Lately, I belong to those who prefer the latter.
Here's why:
1) i gained some weight and they did too. now i can't fit into some shirts comfortably anymore. I don't want to shop for a new batch of clothes for this, man.
2) the week before the time of the month, they HURT and they are swollen, literally. Ugh.
3) no matter what i wear, i feel i still manage to look indecent! No matter how i try to look sporty, i can't.
4) i'm not confident wearing sleeveless tops in public because... even when i'm usually wearing simple shirts, i don't find it flattering when people stare 'there'. It's actually 'nakakabastos' :S
5) it's hard to run especially when you're not well-supported.
6) i hate that i need to exert some effort to hide them when i have to walk past carpenters,drivers and tambays.
7) i can't wear v-neck shirts because people will think i'm doing it on purpose and i want to show them.
8) i'm not confident wearing shirts that are too tight on that area. they may fit me well, but there's always the 'problem' in that upper section.
9) i can't wear 2 blouses i like, because i can't button the shirt anymore.
10) when i need to take public transpo, my opus dei thinking mother tells me to wear a jacket on top of my shirt because it's too fitted and sexy. "Everything's too fitted!"
11) i don't like buying from the undergarments section because i end up with the wrong size often.
12) they make me look fat/fatter. I get nasty comments depending on what i wear beneath my shirt. darn.
13) i came across this man before who looked down there and said "uy dako!". I know what that means you idiot.
14) walking around the mall or along a busy street with all those men terrifies me because i feel like some pervert my grab them out of the blue. Seriously.
15) an infant grabbed it thrice when i was in a packed elevator. "I'm not your mommy, darn it!"
There. I finally let it all out. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. I know it's not that humongous compared to bold stars, but I'm not a bold star. And I'm not the type who wants attention from insignificant people. I can't believe this issue already affected my self-esteem ever since I hit freaking puberty.
So to those who aren't satisfied and want them bigger, think again. But if you've made up your mind, then call me 'cause I'm willing to donate some of what I have right now. :P
1:23 PM
10 things I learned/realized over the weekend
1) Mr. Hale is Jahnniz’s close college friend. Haha funny.
2) Chiana’s birthday party expenses is worth 3 months of my salary (I think)
3) 2 of my friends work for Super Ferry, and soon, another 2 will be working as flight attendants. Wow. Charl for Air Phils. and Niz for a Saudi airline
4) Don’t --------------- to avoid more embarrassing momentsss.
5) I should get a haircut soon. It’s been 5 months since I last entered the salon! :P
6) Dulcolax works. You take a crap after 8 hours of taking it. Good for those with constipation.
7) I want to have a children’s party-themed birthday. I want wrapped gifts! Cge na kahit anong laman, basta naka-wrap. Wag lang buhay or mabaho.
8) Children’s parties gave me weird feelings about my batchmates who brought along their kids. We’re old, man.
9) I’m frustrated about my salary if I compare it with how much others are getting. I think I’ll always be dissatisfied. Haay.
10) I want to try working abroad, and gain more independence. I used to be very open about that idea, but now something (or is it someone) who’s stopping me from leaving. I guess everything really happens for a reason.
5:57 PM
Monday, July 04, 2005
